When we want to forget – Part 3

Have you ever felt like you in a place like this woman above? Wearing a blind-fold, she attempts to forget where she is and where she’s been. She feels trapped with no way to escape. She definitely in the middle of turmoil.

I have to admit something. I haven’t always understood why I experienced so much turmoil in my life. With it came a lot of fear from multiple sources. If only I knew what to do. If I had understood not only the what’s but, most importantly, the why’s, I believe I would have somehow caught a glimpse into what to do to change those circumstances for myself.

We cannot change the past, but WE CAN do something about its result. It is completely within our power to do something about what we experience today. Today is the day for change, not tomorrow. Whatever your reality, you can do something about it.

The trouble that most of us experience is that we aren’t exactly sure what to do. You can go and visit a psychologist, or even a psychiatrist, to start talking about your problems, but even they are limited when it comes to the results that you get. Ultimately, it is still up to you to do the work to see change take place. No matter what path you choose, you will still have to do the work. In this, education is paramount.

In Part 1 and Part 2 of When you want to forget, I talked about what most of us don’t – fear. I am not referring to surface experiences, or the fears that most of us have. I want to talk about the fears that are unique to you.

I am referring to the fears that we cannot shake, because they have found themselves embedded deep within our minds. These are the fears that I want to talk about. They are the fears that you keep to yourself, because you feel too ashamed or vulnerable to talk about them.

Referring back to the verse I used in Part 1 and Part 2 of this series, Roman’s 2:12 NIV says

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. – Romans 12:2 NIV

In previous posts, I talked about how what we feed our minds affects us not only emotionally and mentally, but physically.

Once I began reading the Bible, I started to learn what was good, productive food for my mind and what wasn’t. For example, I remember a time when I listened to all kinds of music, and most of that music did not have any uplifting tones. Looking back, it was quite depressing, really. Anything that wasn’t positive was simply not good for me to hear, especially since I had been dealing with depression for a good portion of my life.

Once I began to realize that the music I was listening to was having a negative affect on me, I through it all in the garbage and changed all of the presets of my car radio to a more uplifting, or positive, station. This was a Christian station. The change didn’t take long to have a positive affect on me. I actually enjoyed the songs that spoke of how I was loved and that I wasn’t the only one in this universe that was having a tough time. It filled my soul with such peace! And some of those songs were even fun to listen to and sing! Something I never expected.

Another example was my pursuit to deal with any negative and destructive voices from others; it was something I would have to learn to ignore. I do understand that there are two sides to this: something that we invite and then something that is thrust upon us. It was all something I would have to learn to work through with Jesus by my side.

The result of reading the Bible is if you read it with an open mind you will find so much wisdom within it. It is not a book of rules. If you are truly open to it, it will penetrate your heart and bring healing. There is so much that you can gain from reading it, because it reveals the truth about so many things. Reading the Bible isn’t just something you do, it is something you experience.

I believe completely within my heart that knowing the truth about something also reveals whether or not it is something good for me or not, and if there is something that the Bible reveals to me that is not good, I must do something about it.

I know that the Bible says that we should listen to God and follow his instruction, but there is a completely different side to this. If the truth is revealed to us, then power is in our hands. If we know the truth about something then we have the power to change how those things affect us. There is a lot of wisdom in the Bible that will, in turn, also make us wise, not only in our choices but also in our inter-action others.

So if the Bible is telling us the truth and bringing light to a situation then you must understand that the Bible also tells us what to do about it. This is not about judgement. This is about giving you the keys to change your circumstances for the better. We should never let life have what it wants, because it will take everything from you. You may think that avoiding God will give you freedom, but all it does is deceive you into thinking so.

This is one of the ways that Satan seeks to destroy your life – through lies and deception. If you think that I am wrong, then test God in this. I have had 18 years of God making himself known to me and revealing the deception of the enemy. Satan is a sneaky little guy. I call him little, because as children of the Most High God, we have the authority to tell him to leave us alone. We just need to make sure we don’t leave the door open for him to come back.

When there are things we want to forget, there has to be a way to change your experience. There has to be a way for us to not only accept something as a fact but also look it in the eye with NO FEAR. As most of us know, we cannot change the past, but we can change how much affect it has on our present and our future.

There is a way, actually. I have spoken to you about the power that God gives you to cause change. But it really depends on whether you are ready for that change and place it into in Gods hands. Being a child of God is not about just following God; it’s also about yielding your will over to him. Often times our methods of fixing problems can make things worse. When we let Jesus (God in the flesh) carry our burdens, we don’t have to. We can then have time to heal and set ourselves on the correct path – a path that sets fear aside so we can boldly move forward into the future without hindrance.

That feeling of condemnation does not come from God, but rather, it is Satan who seeks to accuse you. This is why you feel the way you do. It is your body and soul that is reacting to the enemy and his accusation. But when you submit it to Jesus, you have given him permission to defend you. But remember this also: Jesus has to know you first. He won’t know you unless you enter into a relationship with him.

This is when all of those worries and feeling of regret can begin to subside. For some, it may take a while. It did for me, because I not only needed to learn to ask for forgiveness but also learn to forgive others. It was all keeping me from experiencing freedom from all of the condemnation. When you set yourself right with God, Satan doesn’t have a leg to stand on in the heavenly courts.

Not only is Jesus preparing a place for us, as he told the disciples before ascending into heaven, he is also standing before the Father (God) as our advocate pleading our case for our innocence. If we are forgiven, then who can stand against us. We gain our power for change through Jesus.

So, I have a question for you. What do you want to forget? Start talking to God about it telling him how you feel. Ask him for forgiveness for ever allowing those things to hinder you. Read the Bible for inspiration and comfort being careful to be open to what God is seeking to reveal to you.

Most of all remember this: a realization of sin is not a time for you to feel condemnation. SIN is an ACCIDENTAL act of disobedience. INIQUITY is a WILLFUL, PREMEDITATED act of disobedience. Either way, it hurts you and those around you. But know this: if you ask for Jesus to forgive you and carry your burdens, you will no longer feel that condemnation if your intention was sincere. Remember that in this fleshly state of humanness, we often make mistakes more than once. Be open to approaching God again if your sin re-surfaces. You will always be forgiven and be set right with God when your heart is sincere. But remember, also, that have the need to seek God for solution out of the lifestyle or sin that entangles us.

Go forth and be blessed, my friend!

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What was I thinking— writing this book?

For those of you who have read my blog posts, you might have begun to learn a little about me.  There is so much more about my life to learn and what drives me to do what I am doing.  I honestly don’t like sharing much about my past, because, well, people judge.  So often people choose to take what you have said and find ways to use it against you.  Why is our honesty somehow considered offensive to someone who had nothing to do with what you have said?  Unfortunately, it is the world we live in; honesty isn’t readily welcomed.

But today, something deep down inside me said, “Cynthia, you must tell them why.  Tell them why you wrote the book, When The One You Love Doesn’t Love You Anymore.”  I considered doing a video to place on the front page of my website, but that voice told me that later could be too late.  I know, without a doubt, that it was God’s voice that expressed to me that today is the day to share this, not later.  So, friend, here it goes.

I grew up in the suburbs of Dallas, Texas, in an area known for gang activity and crime.  It wasn’t the worst part of the city, but where we lived wasn’t too far from some of the worst crime areas.  Growing up, it wasn’t out of the ordinary to hear gunshots at night, and— trust me—nobody was shooting a deer to feed their family.  I remember being shot at one evening as I drove a friend home.  The police were called and guns were drawn as a road-block was set up to secure the area.  It was an intense night, and us girls, only around the age of 17, stood in disbelief and terror in the reality of what was happening. 

The environment that I grew up in did not leave room for dreams.  Many people who grow up the way I did struggle to succeed.  In the years to follow, our family went through a lot of changes.  Some changes were good, and some were not so good.  As an adult, I would find myself married and then divorced, not once, but twice.  I found myself, for years, dealing with depression and with no help.  There wasn’t availability to get counseling, and there wasn’t anyone to throw me a rope to pull me out of the pit I was in. 

THEN there was the day that everything changed.  God came to me in my lonely and depressive state and comforted me in ways that are hard to describe.  That day, I met God for the first time!  It is a day I will never forget!  That day set me on a path that changed everything and led me to places I could only dream of.  I met God, and I met my purpose!  I really struggled in so many areas of my life.  I am now a changed woman blessed in so many ways – some of those blessings are even things I never knew to dream, but they are awesome! 

You may ask, “So, why did you write that book, Cynthia?”  What is my answer?  I wrote this book, because you DESERVE to know.  You DESERVE to know the truth about life, and that life as you know it can be sweeter than anything you ever tasted.  Not too sweet, but that perfect balance of sweet that makes you laugh and experience joy like you never have before.  This is what it feels like to experience the love of God.

So, my friend, you DESERVE to hear the truth about what it is like to put your past behind you.  You DESERVE to experience success that doesn’t come from the toil of your own hands but from a diligent, gratifying working of the hands.  You DESERVE to experience true love.  You DESERVE to know that there is a way to overcome alcoholism, drug addiction, fear, stress, anxiety, financial crises, divorce, tragedy, the loss of loved ones and ALL of your struggles, no matter what it is.    You DESERVE to know what it’s like to not worry.  You DESERVE to know what it’s like for someone to die to save YOUR life.  You DESERVE a chance to change everything for the better.  You DESERVE to know Jesus.  And who am I to keep Jesus from you?  Who am I to choose who is blessed and who isn’t?  Who am I to keep all these things to myself?  It was never just mine to keep.  It was given so that it could be shared.  It was given so that lives could be saved.  It was given so you, too, could know what true love is.  This is why I wrote the book.

Go forth and be blessed, my friend.

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